Celebrating festivals apart: Diwali, Eid, Christmas and more

Festivals are about being with the people you love, which is exactly why they're hard to spend apart. You can't light the same lamps or sit at the same table, but you can still share the day. Here are ideas that work for almost any celebration.

Call first thing in the morning, even briefly, and wish each other properly. If you're in different time zones, agree on which morning counts, or do both.

Walk each other through what the day looks like in your home: the food, the rituals, the music, who comes over. If your families celebrate differently, this is one of the loveliest ways to learn about each other.

Pick one festive dish and make it on a call at the same time: sweets for Diwali, a special meal for Eid, cookies for Christmas. Eat it together afterwards, even if one of you is having it for breakfast.

Wear what you'd wear if you were together. It's a small thing, but getting ready for each other makes the day feel like an occasion rather than just another call.

Diwali lamps, Holi colours, Eid lanterns, Christmas lights: make them part of the background and take a strip together. TwoFrames has festive frames for Diwali, Holi, Eid, Christmas and New Year, so the photos match the day.

If you're comfortable, bring your partner onto a quick call with family during the celebrations. Even five minutes of saying hello makes them feel included.

Post a small box to arrive before the day: sweets from your city, a small decoration, a handwritten card. Opening it together on a call is a lovely moment.

Make a plan to spend the next big festival in the same place, and put it on the calendar. "Next Diwali together" is a powerful thing to look forward to.

Every festival has its own feel. A few ideas for some of the big ones:

• Diwali: light a diya at the same moment on a call, share the rangoli you made, and swap boxes of sweets in the post beforehand.
• Holi: play with colours in your own cities and take photos in the same white clothes before and after. Compare who ended up more colourful.
• Eid: share the morning after prayers, show each other your outfits, and cook one dish from the feast together.
• Christmas: open one present each on a call, watch the same Christmas film in sync, or decorate a small tree in each home on the same evening.
• New Year: with time zones, you might celebrate midnight twice. Call at your midnight and again at theirs, and make one resolution together for the year ahead.

Many long-distance couples come from different backgrounds. That can be one of the richest parts of the relationship. Ask your partner to teach you about their festival: what it means, how their family celebrates, which dishes matter most. Learn a greeting in their language. Next year, you might be the one cooking the festive meal.

If one of you doesn't celebrate a particular festival, you can still join in the parts that feel comfortable, like the food, the music or simply calling to say you're thinking of them.

If you're in very different time zones, the festival might be in full swing for one of you while the other is asleep. Agree on a plan ahead of time: maybe a morning call for one person and an evening call for the other, with a longer celebration on the day that suits you both best. Recording a short video of your celebrations to share later also helps the other person feel part of it.

Festivals are often family occasions, and joining in from a distance can mean a lot. If both of you are comfortable with it, ask to say hello to your partner's family during the celebrations. Learn the right greeting for the day, ask about the food and the traditions, and keep it short and warm. Many families remember the partner who called on their festival day. Our guide to meeting family over video has tips if it's the first time.

Over time, you can build your own traditions for festivals apart: the same dish every year, a strip with matching outfits, a letter you each write about the year. When you eventually celebrate in the same place, those traditions come with you.

Festivals can bring up a lot of feelings when you're apart, and it's okay if one of you gets a little sad. Make space for that, and remind each other that this year is a chapter, not the whole story.